Seven Entirely Useless Facts

Most people think the Rack-o-saurus is extinct. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

So, yesterday was my birthday.* It was a good day. I spent most of it eating food that’s very bad for me and drawing ninjas and cat-girls**.  In between those activities, I managed to put together this list of More Things You Should Know About Me.***

1) I Own More Superhero T-Shirts Than Other Shirts. One of the benefits of working from home. Bonus fact: I have three each of Captain Marvel and Iron Man.

2) If You Ever See Me Out Running, There’s An Even Chance I’m Pretending To Be A Giant Robot. Well, how do you get through your workouts?

3) My Favourite Drink Is Whiskey. Straight up. Scotch usually, Lagavulin 16 year old for preference. It pairs as nicely with a handmade creme brulee as with double stuff Oreos.

4) I am Rack-o-saurus. This is my friend’s term for the size of my breasts. I wear a medium in bikini bottoms and an XXL in tops. It’s entirely disproportionate. Upside: I rarely paid for drinks when I was in university. Downside: I have fallen over a lot. I’m top heavy.

5) I am a Dungeon Master. And a Game Master. And a Keeper, and a Storyteller, and all the other names the different gaming systems stick on the person who runs the game and throws horrible things at the PCs. It’s a lot of fun, though I usually prefer playing over running a game.
If I’d taken up the hobby when I was single, it could have worked out well for me. Female DMs are a rarity; female DMs with the aforementioned rack-o-saurus characteristics even more so. I could have dressed in a chain mail bikini and worked nerd bachelor parties.

6) I Really Like Opera. Classical music in general****, really, but opera has a special place in my heart. Or ears. Probably ears.

7) The Only Movie To Make Me Cry Since I Was Five Was Up. I mean, seriously. Have you seen the first nine minutes of that movie?

There you go: seven more entirely useless facts about me. Writing on writing resumes on Monday. In the meantime, I’ve got birthday junk food to finish.

*31. Officially in my thirties now. And it’s awesome.
**Normally I dislike the diminutive ‘girl’ as a suffix, but the character in this case is 17, so not legal age, so girl it is. Otherwise, I would have said I was drawing cat-women.
***Last year’s edition is here. I think this is going to be a tradition.
****Except Mozart. Fuck that guy.

Once More Around the Sun

Go ahead. Make an age joke. (Photo by Krys C.)

It is my birthday. I got a gun and a pit of fire.*

When future generations look back and ask how I got started in super-villainy, point them to this day.

I thought this would be a good opportunity to get to know each other better. Because it’s my birthday and I can do what I want. So here, in no particular order, are random facts I think you should know:

1) I was almost born in an airport. Apparently I saw an opportunity to flee small town life early and tried to take it.

2) I have six tattoos. Only five of which most people have ever seen.

3) I wear a Catholic holy medal in spite of being an atheist. My mother got it for me, and it’s Saint Jude, the patron saint of lost causes. She’s got a sense of humour, my mother.

4) I once got so drunk I thought I’d learned to speak Russian. Which was convenient, since Krys had forgotten how to speak English.

5) When I first met my husband, I was wearing a viking helmet and holding an axe in my teeth. And he still married me.

6)  I quit smoking seven years ago this week and there are still days when I would knock someone down in the street for their cigarette.**

7) When I was fourteen, I got stuck in a tire swing at the park and had to be rescued by the fire department. With the jaws of life.

There. Now you have a more complete picture of me. I hope it helps. Or at least constitutes fair warning.

Back to writing on writing on Friday. For today I shoot things and set other things on fire.

*No, seriously. I did. A Sig Sauer pellet pistol and a fire pit. S’mores and BB target shooting=birthday awesome.
**But I don’t. Not yet, anyway.